I opted for "Forgiveness."

I met with my COM mentor on Sunday, and it was such a blessing. Maybe an even bigger blessing was his wife, who is just a force to be reckoned with. My Mentor believes that the spiritual director's training program is a good idea, certainly a wise use of my time over the next year or two.

We went to Mass together, and then sat over lunch for at least two hours. Bless their hears, Mentor and Mrs. Mentor listened to so many of my frustrations with patience and kindness. Mr. M went with me, and his shy self was able to speak clearly and frankly with them about his concerns, too-- I was so proud of him.

So, I've sent the following email to the head of the COM and my (on-sabbatical) mentor. Here's hoping it's respectful enough to mute the fact that I'm just hauling off and doing what I want to do:

I wanted to touch base with both of you about my formation for the next year or two.

I’m very interested in Oasis Ministry’s 2-year training for Spiritual Directors. You may be familiar with the program: G and K have both had some interaction with the diocese, and J of the cathedral is the president of their board.

I’ve spoken with L, my mentor on the COM, and we agree that there are a number of reasons that this program would be a good fit for me at this point. I believe that active spiritual engagement with supportive peers will start to address some of the concerns raised by the COM in April. I’m personally very excited about the program; the training in listening both to one another and to God will be so valuable in whatever ministry lies ahead of me. At the end of the 2 years Mr. M and I will be in a much better position financially to start seminary.

I’m sending in my application this week, and the first retreat will take place in October. The time commitment is very manageable, and my employer is happy to be accommodating on the handful of weekdays that are required. I’m particularly pleased that my schedule will remain flexible, as I’m eager to work with you on any diocesan/parish formation you feel is necessary and appropriate.

Thank you for your consideration.


  1. Great letter. I'm so glad that you have found the support and encouragement you need and will be able to go forward with this wonderful program.

  2. PS: Have you thought about using a font large enough to read? I know you don't know this yet, but there will come a time in your life when those teeny tiny words will cause actual physical pain to you as a reader. Just sayin' ...with smiles and good humor.

  3. Gannet-- thanks for the tip!! Is this better?

    (And the support, both of you.)

    PS-- I got support from the higher-ups, so it's a go-- if they have room for me!

  4. Oh, THANK YOU!!!!!!

    There are a couple of blogs that I love but do little more than glance at because, really, it hurts to read them -- and I didn't want yours to fall into that category.

  5. Congratulations and blessings as you begin you SD training.

  6. Oh! I am very, very glad for you. This is wonderful! Your letter is great, and I'm especially happy that you got a chance to speak frankly with your COM person (& Mrs.) and get support in return.

    *happy dance for Mrs. M*

    ps- we should talk sometime.. maybe the weekend?

  7. This is great, Mrs. M. I think the tone of your letter is spot on, both respectful and forthright. I believe you are a good candidate for SD training. I've loved my training.

  8. Congratulations on going to SD training. I am doing that now, too, so maybe we can give suggestions and awarenesses to each other as we go along? Maybe?

  9. Hurray! Good letter, and even better that your COM contact is great. That'll make a big difference over time, I hope!

  10. Beautiful! I am very excited for you. What a great program. I'm a bit jealous, actually. You go!

  11. Congratulations and well handled!

  12. Rock on! I know I'm late catching up but I hadda comment anyway -- the letter is great, I think it falls right in 'respectful' but still says 'but I'm gonna do it anyway'.

    Continuing prayers!


"So keep fightin' for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't you forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce. And when you get through kickin' ass and celebratin' the sheer joy of a good fight, be sure to tell those who come after how much fun it was."
-Saint Molly Ivins