It's stunning how much closer to God pain can bring you-- if you take it from the right angle. Certainly we can ask the "Why me, God?!" question, but though there are valid feelings behind it, it doesn't heal us.

What I'm finding has blown open my perspective on our relationship with God is considering how God deals with the same betrayals and hurts we inflict on each other. How do You love us when we've been unfaithful? How do You love us when we don't respect You? How do you choose to move forward in the relationship, knowing that there is still shrapnel inside, that the wound isn't going to heal completely?

I don't have answers, but asking the questions is a really helpful start. Asking as I climb my way into a gentle, loving Father's lap is even more helpful.

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"So keep fightin' for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't you forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce. And when you get through kickin' ass and celebratin' the sheer joy of a good fight, be sure to tell those who come after how much fun it was."
-Saint Molly Ivins